A Typical Day
by Karna
Summary: Get ready for the story to rule all stories. Now at an end...Or is it?
1. Chapter 1

** Disclaimer: I do not in any way own Code Lyoko... And I'm glad I don't. Yes, I do hate most of the shows I talk about. This should not personally offend you.**

The night was still young. Jeremy was on the edge of his seat while Odd and Yumi were battling the pixel monsters on Lyoko. "Ok you guys, remember, Ulrich's fighting giant robots on the moon, if he dies, he won't come back!" said Jeremy in his fake low toned voice.

Lately, the team had been separated from eachother. Odd was off being.. well, odd. Yumi and Ulrich were off at their usual hangouts, being all dramatic, and even though she could be on Earth now, Aelita felt more away from Jeremy than ever.

"Don't worry Einstein, even though I stink at life, and have really bad aim, we can do it!" said Odd, firing 10 shots at a single tiny Xana before hitting it. "Yeah Jeremy! I mean, even though Ulrich is the only one with good powers-I'M JAPANESE!" bursted out Yumi. Aelita, who was running away screaming as usual, had time to turn around and see the 3 tinies that were after her.

"Help!" said Aelita, as all the power she had was control over time and space. "Coming!" screamed Yumi, still obsessing over her Japanese descent. As Yumi hopped through the frozen wasteland, she threw one of her fans, but clearly missed. "I was so close!" she said, as she threw the other one. There was an explosion as she hit her first monster of the attack.

"Aaaaah!" screamed Aelita, as she became surrounded by hundreds of tinies, square Xanas, spider Xanas, and the Skipozoa, who's only purpose is to drain Aelita's memory for no apparent reason!

Suddenly, back in the computer room, Sissy entered from the padlocked door. "So this is where you and your nerd friends hang out! Did you know what I did to get here! Is my par par hair frizzy? It always tends to get frizzy when it's humid. Why do you hate me so much! What did I ever do to your friends! Why are y-" she said, as Jeremy used his telekenetic powers to knock her out and store her in a crate destined for Asia. "Now, back to the matter at hand," said Jeremy. "I've got a plan guys!"

**Stay tuned for chapter 2... This isn't exactly a parody yet!**


	2. Harvesting

**I live for these kind of reviews... Yes, I do have bitter sarcasm and a hate for all things Lyoko.**

**Chapter 2: Harvesting**

Jeremy sat in his seat typing hundreds of lines of code per second, seeing as he's a genius. "Don't worry guys, I have a great plan!" Jeremy explained to the others, who were fighting for their virtual lives on Lyoko,"I'm going to harvest your combined stupidity to form an explosion so big, it may wipe out all the Xana monsters!"

As Jeremy said that, there was a giant explosion in the computer room! As the dust cleared, Jeremy could make out Ulrich. "Don't worry Jeremy, I'm not hurt. I'll fend off the giant robots for a while longer," said Ulrich as he started to fly back up to the moon. "Alright, I'll alert the others!" said Jeremy, "Guys, Ulrich has just about had it with the robots, we have to hurry! Guys? Guys!"

"We already died, Einstein," said Odd as he walked into the computer room, "no thanks to you."

"Noooo! Now what are we going to do?" exclaimed Jeremy as he saved all the code for later... If there was a later. He suddenly had a foolish idea. "Wait, what if we harvest the energy from the mass of Yumi's giant forehead? Then we could make an explosion large enough to kill all of the Xana monsters! That's so crazy, it just might work!" exclaimed Jeremy, as he attached the conveniently placed mass energifier helmet onto Yumi's head. "What are you doing?" said Yumi, who was standing next to Odd along with Aelita. "I'm attaching a mass energifier helmet onto you. This may kill you, but I think we'll have to take that chance!" said Jeremy, caring only about his and Aelita's well-being.

"Fine, it's for the sake of the world..." said Yumi. "That's the spirit!" said Jeremy, who was now activating the program, "I hope this works..."

** Stay tuned for Chapter 3! Will Yumi finally die? **


	3. Sector 5

**There'll be much more bitter hatred for Lyoko in this chapter..**

**Chapter 3: Sector 5**

As Jeremy started the program that, according to the charts, had a 89.65 chance to kill Yumi, Ulrich, while fighting giant robots, felt as if something was missing. As always, Ulrich had many unexpressed feelings, which he showed by punching Odd in the face last night... And the night before... And pretty much every night, crying himself to sleep because he never got to say how much he loved Yumi. Poor Ulrich, who felt he had no right to live, because of his petty existence in this French world he called home, and how his parents sent him to a boarding school.

He thought to him self, _is this love even worth it? She dresses up in blackpar every day, in her sweater, even when it's 92 degrees (F) outside! I mean, can you get anypar more goth? And what about her being Japanese? That may have an impression on some otherpar people, even that one guy who I hate because he_ talks_ to her as if she were human!_

As Ulrich was drawn from his sexist thoughts back to reality where people are normal for the most part, Jeremy was getting excited about testing his new gadget that came from nowhere. "Okay, counting down in 5... This is so exciting! 4...Omgz omgz lyk lyk! 3... This is gonna be so cool! 2... I HAVE A BIG FOREHEAD! 1... Aelita!"

They paused for a moment as it sounded as if a high-speed jet crashed through the room, sending Jeremy, Aelita, and Odd sprawling. For a moment, Yumi felt like she disappeared off the face of the Earth, which, oddly enough, was a bit smaller than the perimeter of her forehead.

When Yumi came to, she was in her room. She looked over at the Japanese clock she had. She couldn't really speak Japanese, but it was dark outside, so she knew it was very early in the morning. She looked around and could barely make out a piece of paper. She turned on the light and examined it more closely.

_Yumi, although the energy from your forehead was easily more than enough to annihilate every monster Xana sent out, and we later deactivated the tower, and we have learned how Xana is creating these monsters, Ulrich returned from the moon, and we felt it's necessary to have gone to Sector 5 in search of the Skipazoa. I could have just as easily defeated those monsters some otherway, but I decided to risk your life because you're a goth.  
Yours Truly,_

_ Jeremy_

**Heh, it's kind of odd how I wrote more than a page about Yumi's forehead, eh?**


	4. Obsession

**Ok, time for a more entertaining chapter. I've been waiting to make Jeremy say this for  
a while actually.**

**Chapter 4: Obsession**

Yumi awoke to a startling sound, her brother was banging on pans in the kitchen singing "Yumi and Ulrich sitting in a tr-" as his mother interrupted, saying, "What did I tell you about hitting my pans? If you're going to sing, sing in JAPANESE!"

Yumi suddenly remembered the night before, about how Jeremy risked her life and her humungous forehead to save Lyoko. Then, she suddenly remembered that they were going to Sector 5. She got out of bed, and rushed to school as fast as she could, seeing as she was  
dressed from before, in her usual black sweater, black pants, and probable dyed black hair.

As she rushed to school, wondering if they had been succesful doing whatever they wanted to do, she remembered that they had a science test! _Oh well,_ she thought, _I'll just ace the test with my Japanese powers._ As she came in sight of the school, she saw three figures sitting on the bench, their usual hangout.

If I could interject for a moment... Now, if it was a small school without pools or soccer fields and stuff like that, I can understand hanging out on a bench in the morning, but seeing as it's a boarding school, I'd like to ask here and now how they can always go about as if they didn't have anything to do! They have a pool, soccer field, and a sauna! Now, back to the story.

"Ko-nee-shee-wah!"(**YES, I KNOW IT'S SPELLED WRONG!) **said Yumi as she approached, apparently out of breath from running 1/8th of a mile, "Fill me in on what happened last night!"

"IT'S THE WORK OF XANA!" exclaimed Jeremy, as the batteries to his gameboy ran out, "I KNOW IT!" They say that there's a thin line between intelligence and insanity. Well, throughout the years, Jeremy had been slowly inching past that line, and he finally broke. "You're all figments of Xana's creation... THAT SQUIRREL IS THE WORK OF XANA!" he said as he ran off into the distance, blaming Xana for every tiny mishap.

"What the heck?" asked Odd, who was over by Sissy, harassing her as usual. "I think he's worked up about the antivirus he's working on for me, not to mention my mysterious past with the hermitage, the mysteries of life, and last but not least, his Half-Life 2 file he downloaded onto the super computer and plays while we're deactivating towers and fighting Xana monsters," said Aelita, who had been silent the last few days. "Oh, too bad, I guess Yumi will have to do all those things now that he went crazy," said Ulrich.

Later in class, they were talking about diatomic fragments of super-compulsive stars relating to how sponges soak up water. This gave Odd and Ulrich perfect time to talk about what they did on Lyoko, even though Yumi was the one who needed to know. "Meh, I don't think going there was useful, all we did was give the Skipazoa a chance to erase Aelita's memory," said Odd. "Well, why would it be helpful to Xana if he DID erase her memory? We could just tell her what she's told us about her dreams, not to mention about how Xana wants to destroy the world, destroying him in the process." whispered Ulrich. They watched as Mrs. Hertz was trying to turn on the television for a documentary on seawater sponges, but failed in getting the video into the VCR.

Suddenly, Jeremy stood up and yelled, "This must be the work of Xana!" and bolted out of the classroom, running towards the factory to finish his game of Half-Life 2.

**What happened to Jeremy? Find out!**


	5. Oblivion

**Finally! Chapter 5! Time to learn what happens to Jeremy!**

**Chapter 5: Oblivion**

As Jeremy ran into the night, fractured thoughts went through his mind. _"Aelita! Hermitage... Xana? France..Hopper? School! World peace? T...Towers? Half-Life 2! Yes! I have found my meaning!_" He thought as he ran through the factory.

**Now, for another interjection.** I'd like to know a few things that they've never explained. What was the old factory used for, and why was it never demolished! Shouldn't it be infested with rats and other things? How did they ever find it, and how did JEremy figure out how to devirtualize them? Why do they go through the sewer, and who supplies their transportation?

Now, these things came to Jeremy's mind. "_This must be yet another one of Xana's many traps he set for us, even though he's supposed to only be able to possess mechanical things, not make small teddy bears giant or anything..._" He finally reached the safety of the super computer, and starting p00ning soldiers on Half-Life 2, like a nerd should.

Now, obviously, the others were doing absolutely nothing in their spare time, except maybe harass Sissy a little, and maybe rant about how Jim, who, incidentally, is the GYM teacher, always gets them into trouble, even though they cause it.

"Yo kato no wee," said Yumi. "What the heck does that mean, Einstein?" said Odd. "I don't know, but it probably means something like 'we should do something about Jeremy,' in Japanese," said Yumi. Ulrich replied with, "Wait until I finish my daily sulking, even though I'm the best out of this whole group!"

And with that, the group seceded from Toontown.

**What the heck? Find out in Chapter 6!**


	6. Suffering

**What the heck is with Toontown! Find out now!**

**Chapter 6: Suffering**

It was a bright and sunny morning when Odd walked down the hall. He proceeded down to the cafeteria, as breakfast was being served, and today was Belgian waffle day, and Odd wasn't going to miss THIS for anything in the world.

The gang was in their usual spot ON THE BENCH when he arrived. Odd casually asked, "What's going on, Einstein!" Ulrich replied with, "Who are you talking to? Nobody here is named Einstein, and Jeremy went crazy, remember? Now don't bother me, I need to sulk."

Suddenly, Sissy appeared, and said, "Good morning guys! I was wondering if you wanted to pla-" "EMERGENCY PLAN ZETA!" yelled Yumi, as they all pulled out metal nightsticks and started beating Sissy senselessly, except for Yumi, who pulled out a katana, since she's Japanese. After a couple of minutes, their arms finally got tired, so they went back to the BENCH. "Wow! That was fun, we should do that more often," exclaimed Odd.

"Hmm... Now that Sissy has her daily beating, what should we do?" asked Yumi. Aelita replied with, "Well, we could-" "THAT WILL NEVER WORK!" screamed Ulrich as he slapped Aelita across the face, and ran off sulking.

Later, Yumi found Ulrich in the meadow, where he always went when he was sulking, therefore he was always there, except when he wasn't. Ulrich said, "What are you doing? Go find that other boy that likes you, I know you secretly hate me, and wish to kill me in my sleep," Yumi thought, "_How did he know?"_ "Don't be silly, I'm your friend Ulrich!" said Yumi, "Besides, there are other people we can hate, together, like Sissy!"

"Yeah, I guess you're right, " said Ulrich, feeling better. "Well, I'd love to talk to you now," said Yumi lyingly, "But I have to go shopping with my mom."

**Check out next chapter, where Yumi goes shopping, and all goes wrong!**


	7. Redemption

**The story has become more of a random quirk of Code Lyoko rather than making fun of it. At this point, the gang hasn't had a Xana alert in a while.**

Chapter 7: Redemption

Yumi bade the others farewell, as she headed to her house across the street to go shopping with her mom. Her mom greeted her with, "Kotaba wit oh em gee."

What her mom didn't know is that it translated directly into, "I think Yumi's forehead is a disgrace," but we'll just excuse her. "Mom, you know I'm still learning Japanese," said Yumi. As they got in the car with Yumi's brother, they sped off 3 doors down to the only Kimono shop in France. As they got out, Yumi's little brother said, "Wow, Yumi is in wuv!" This enraged Yumi to the point where, if she was in Lyoko, she would've aken out one of her FANS and tried to throw it at her brother, but miss wildly.

As they wlaked into the ONLY kimono shop in France, the clerk looked at them dully. "Oh, isn't this a nice kai-moe-no Yumi?" asked her mom, pointing to a yellow kimono with pink dots. "Wow, Mom, that's cool! Can I get that for the dance?" replied Yumi, sharing her mother's terrible sense of fashion. Her mother walked up to the clerk and said, "I'd like to buy this kai-moe-no."

The clerk, by now, was infuriated at their use of Japanese. She jumped onto her desk and yelled, "You don't deserve to be Japanese! It's pronounced kee-moe-no, not kai-moe-no! You people are disgraces to Japanese! Now get out of my store!"

As they got back into the car, Yumi was terrified, until they stopped at Burger Queen. They ordered their food, and sat down. 3 and 1/2 seconds later, a hostess served their food, and Yumi's little brother was about to bite into his when his mother yelled, "USE YOUR CHOPSTICKS!"

Reluctantly, he took out some chopsticks and tried to start eating his burger, but it was simply too heavy with chopsticks. Yumi skillfully used hers to devour her burger quickly (Not really, the black hole in her head enveloped it before she had the chance.), and decided to go across the street to see the gang.

When Yumi got there, exhausted from running 30 yards, she had seen Jeremy and the others at the BENCH. Jeremy was saying something about beating Half-Life 2, and returning to normal. Well, just then, Sissy came along, and said, "Hi gu-" but this time, Jeremy interrupted her, saying, "HOW DID YOU GET OUT OF THE BOX!" as he lifted his hand. Sissy suddenly was raised into the air, and her back snapped backwards, and was flung into a conveniently placed box. As Jeremy powered up, he muttered, "To Asia you go!" He then used all his mindful powers to make the box hurtle towards somewhere in Asia.

Suddenly, the PA system of the school started saying, "Xana Alert! Xana Alert! Xana Alert!" in Jeremy's utterly fake voice. Jeremy, who seemed not at all disturbed by Sissy's appearance, said, "Oh! My PA system hookup is working well! We better get to the lab, so we can deactivate the tower!"

As they got to the lab by going through the sewers as usual, Jeremy started dividing up the teams. "Ulrich and Yumi, you'll be on Lyoko with Aelita. Odd, since you're no help anyways, go back to the schol and make sure Sissy hasn't returned."

As they got onto Lyoko, 200 yards away from the tower as usual, they dodged a barrage of monsters by hiding behind a giant root. "I'm going out to help," said Yumi. Yumi slipped out, and immediately got dematerialized from the lasers. "Ok, since Yumi was a complete failure, we're going to need osme vehicles, Jeremy," said Ulrich. As he said that, a name recognizer built-in to the computer activated, and started playing the, "You're losing too many life points guys," soundtrack.

Jeremy was walking toward the cafeteria line, and he was going to order a chocolate-vanilla swirl. He thought to himself, What was I doing again? I think it was...Ice cream! Yes, I was going to get ice cream. I wonder where the others are.

Ulrich, after hearing the soundtrack 50 times over, decided Jeremy was going to be no help, so he decided to leap out, triangulate 3 times, and use his super-fast powers to kill all the monsters Xana hath sent out. As soon as it was clear, Aelita made her way. "Thank-" which was all Aelita had time to say before Ulrich virtually slapped her. "SHUT UP!" he said demonically. As they made their way to deactivate the tower, thesuper-computer played it's "Aaaaaah!" theme for Aelita. When they finally got to the tower, a group of tinies was headed towards them, and they stayed outside the tower long enough to have to fight them.

It was a fierce battle, and Aelita just barely survived. She deactivated the tower, and everyone went back to the BENCH. Jeremy was there licking his ice cream, and said, "Hey guys! How did the battle go? Wow, Yumi, I just noticed, your forehead is bigger than mine!"

Then, Yumi realized that her brother and mom were still at Burger Queen, and all was lost.  
**  
Ahhhh. About time I updated. I finally got around to another Xana attack, whereupon Jeremy got to play his "You're losing too many life points!" soundtrack. Stay tuned for Chapter 8!**  



	8. Regeneration

**What will happen to Yumi's family! Find out!**

**Chapter 8: Regeneration**

As suddenly as Yumi realized her terror, another terror broke loose. People in the streets were running from the giant dinosaur from the museum that Xana had brought to life. There were super zombies controlled by Xana running around, doing absolutely nothing. Jeremy nearly dropped his ice cream battling a zombie hand to hand.

Yumi rushed to the Burger Queen, hopeful to see her family. Obviously, her mother and brother were the only ones that didn't run, but instead ran into a corner, basically spelling their own doom. Yumi rushed to the rescue and fought off the demons with her "skill, balance, and prowess". She helped her mother to her feet, and said "I can't explain, but I've got to go, cover yourself! To gah roo dee!" she yelled as she ran to battle more zombies. Quickly, the giant T-Rex skeleton was staring at her straight in the eye, ready to kill. Then, the most unexpected thing happened. With a blurred background behind her, Yumi swiftly yelled, "Transform!" and started to, as said, transform! Her head opened up to reveal a giant robot body, and as she unfolded, the others stared in awe. Once her transformation was complete, she told the others in a robot-like voice, "I'll buy you some time! Go deactivate the tower!"

The others quickly ran to the cover of the sewers, knowing that was the quickest (And safest) way to the factory. As they got furhter, Ulrich was trying to find their way through the sewers. Aelita was quietly following Ulrich, not wanting to get slapped. Jeremy had gotten his enormous head stuck in one of the passages, and was trying to get it unstuck with some conveniently placed butter. Once he had worked his way out, he pushed Ulrich out of the way with his head and said, "You noob, follow me!"

Odd, in the meantime, was trying to think of other people to ridicule now that Sissy was gone. He followed the others into the factory, and was headed into the scanner when Jeremy said, "Ok, this will be a standard tower run. I'm spawning you around 600 yards away from the tower, you're going to have to get there on the super awesome vehicles!" Jeremy spawned them and the vehicles in the desert region, and they proceeded with only one smart comment from Odd, a new all-time record. "EINSTEIN! If ur so samrt, wats 23 + 1 LOL!" yelled Odd, apparently shaken from hours on his new Wi-fi connected laptop. They proceeded another 20 yards or so when Jeremy yelled, "Watch out, oncoming tiny Xanas!"

As he had predicted, 3 tiny Xanas were headed their way. Instead of running from them to get to the tower faster, they decided to battle it out. After a battle too awesome to explain, Odd had died and Ulrich was badly injured. Aelita was screaming the whole time, safely on the one-wheeled motorcycle. They got back on and left for the tower.

Yumi, who had been battling the T-Rex for a while, was beginning to get tired, but she had to hold out for her friends! She fired 8 energy beams, but the T-Rex easily avoided it. Yumi decided to go hand to hand, and started punching at the T-Rex.

The others finally got at the tower without a word, except Jeremy saying, "Come on guys!" around 30 times. Aelita, hopped off the motorcycle, and hopped through the wall of the tower that looked like a burnt-out cigarette. Aelita flew up (or down?) to the place where she enters the data.

Yumi was on the ground, just near death, about to have her head bitten off by the T-Rex.

Aelita entered the password, Lyoko.

The T-Rex suddenly stopped, like it ALWAYS does at the end of the episode, right before it bit onto Yumi's head.

Jeremy yelled "RETURN TO THE PAST NOW!111!one!1shift!"

**Well, I finally updated. Thank the reviewers of this story. I'm glad I made Yumi a transformer. :)**


	9. Sissy's Magical Oriental Adventure!

**Ok, I felt like making another chapter, mainly because that last one got me all hyped up.**

**Chapter 9: Sissy's Magical Oriental Adventure!**

Sissy was confused and in utter pain, yelling in betrayal. She wondered, _Why would my friends would do such a thing to me?_ She still forgave them though, it was probably an accident.

For those of you who might've skipped a chapter, let me recall a piece of a chapter.--- Well, just then, Sissy came along, and said, "Hi gu-" but this time, Jeremy interrupted her, saying, "HOW DID YOU GET OUT OF THE BOX!" as he lifted his hand. Sissy suddenly was raised into the air, and her back snapped backwards, and was flung into a conveniently placed box. As Jeremy powered up, he muttered, "To Asia you go!" He then used all his mindful powers to make the box hurtle towards somewhere in Asia. ---

Sissy, by this time, had thrown up around 5 times. She was still hurtling in the air, and did not know whe- abruptly, her box hit the ground, sending it shattering into pieces. Somehow, Sissy survived to the point where she could crawl to the nearest house. The thoughts running through her head then were nothing but complete babble.

She awoke hours later, in a small house. She wouldn't call it a house, it had paper for walls. She wasn't sure where she was, but she was on the floor wrapped in a blanket. Her body was in a cast. As she gathered her thoughts, she remembered what Jeremy said seconds after snapping her back. She was somewhere in Asia, and by the looks of it, in Japan. She dozed off yet again.

She was startled by a young woman who was cleaning the room. The woman uttered something she could not understand, and hurried out. Seconds later, an old man came into the room. "What is your name?" asked the old man. "Sissy," she replied. "Well, Sissy," he said, "You'll be in great shape by the time you get back to..Er..Are you one of us?" he asked, seeing that Sissy looked very Japanese. "No sir, I'm French," she replied. "Oh, alright. Well, we will teachyou everything you'll need to know to survive in Japan." said the man.

**What surprises lie in wait for Sissy, and will I ever get to the point of this show?**


	10. Incursion

**Been a while since I've made a chapter, sorry to all my fans! We're nearing the end, and finding out more of the plot in this one...**

**Chapter 10: Incursion**

After that battle, nobody spoke to Yumi for a while...Until she found she could no longer transform. Odd was the first to talk to her, and he broke the ice by saying, "i balence for grlfrends at 1nce!1! Lol jk. i hav 8," She didn't feel very encouraged by this statement, so all she said was, "Ko-nee-shee-wah, Odd. Thanks for talking to me."

Meanwhile, Ulrich was sulking more than usual. His best friend had resorted to dating his dog, because he lied about all the girlfriends. Who would seriously want to date a guy who has such an annoying high pitched voice? _I wonder when I can get some more sulking into my schedule,_ he thought, which made him happier, which in turn made him sadder. It kept going like that for a while.

Aelita hadn't talked at all while around Ulrich, for fear of being slapped. She also screamed and cried a lot, because she found out Franz Hopper was her father, and she didn't like it for some reason. She pretended to be the important one in the group, seeing as she was the one whom they materialized and were saving from Xana, but it was really Yumi, and she knew that.

------------

Meanwhile, Sissy was in Japan getting healed by Japanese monks. They were in some weird temple, and it looked very stereotypically They already draw a pentagram around her, and all they had to do was recite the words, "Boga keto magaree!" which was actual Japanese for once. The five monks gathered around her cast-surrounded body, and uttered the prayerful words. Suddenly, there was a huge explosion, one that decimated the Earth! Except it didn't, and Sissy got all better through the power of the ancient Japanese spirits!

Minutes later, they got her out of the full body cast, and she was ready to start her training. "Excelent, you are ready for your Japanese training," said the old man. "Now, let's establish a few things. You are actually Japanese. Your family was one of the first Japanese families, when the good time was here," said the old man. "What is the good time, Mr. Yasuhikonisowaki?" asked Sissy, wondering if she'd have to remember his name again. "It was before the Ishiyama family came, the family which started the Rage of Japan," answered Mr. Yasuhikonisowaki. "The Ishiyama family? Isn't Yumi an Ishiyama?" asked Sissy.

And with that, her minutes of training started.

**Well, now you know more about Sissy's Magical Adventure. Watch out for the next chapter, as it is the second to last.**


	11. Penultimate Training

**This SHOULD be the second to last chapter, but we'll see how it goes. This'll be a long one, so buckle up.**

**Chapter 11: Penultimate Training**

Sissy entered the doorway to the elite ninja training facility. Sensei Yasuhikonisowaki was waiting for her in the corner of the stereotypical wooden dojo. "Apprentice, in the next few days, we will begin training you in the art of elite ninjas. Be wary, this is not for the light of heart," he told her. "I know Sensei, but if I must ever follow my heart, it is now," she replied. After that, they commenced training for the next few days. The first day, she had trouble doing most of the stuff. Everyone pointed and laughed, mainly because she's Sissy. As the days progressed, she got much better. When she was good enough, the Sensei approached her. "You have completed your training. We shall now move on to the most vital part of your Japanese conquest. Summoning," he told her. "Well Sensei, what shall I do to practice?" she asked. "No practice. When the right time comes, you shall know what to do. You have Ancient Japanese blood," he replied, "Now, take this ticket, and go to your French land. You know what you must do. And remember Sissy, you're the only hope against Yumi and her MASSIVE forehead, and the dark secrets it contains. If they ever escape, we shall all be doomed."

Then Sissy walked towards the setting sun. "NINJA ASSASSIN!" a voice yelled out from nowhere, as a ninja shuriken pierced her neck.

---------

**A week later.**

Jeremy already had the group all in his room. There had been another Xana attack, and they were there for a briefing. Odd was yelling and screeching as usual, and Jeremy could barely talk over him. Ulrich was on Jeremy's bed, sulking AS USUAL. Yumi couldn't fit her humongous head into the doorway, so she stood outside listening.

"All right guys, the scanner has picked up a new threat, worse than anything we've ever encountered! Xana has formed a deep cult in the school, but we can't do anything about it. What's odd is, there doesn't seem to be an activated tower this time, but I just KNOW it's a work of Xana!" exclaimed Jeremy, the self-proclaimed genius. "Weel inestine wat r we sooposd 2 do loolol!" asked Odd, demandingly. "We wait and see what develops. In the meantime, we're supposed to go to Yumi's speech on the many ways she's Japanese," replied Jeremy, "I only hope nothing goes terribly wrong."

**This turned out to be the second to last...So prepare yourself for the best part of this story yet, the one I've been saving for the very last part.**


	12. The Battle

**This is the FINAL chapter of this story. Let's hope it's as good as I thought it would be.**

**Chapter 12: The Battle**

"And that's the 23rd reason why I'm Japanese," said Yumi, "Now, for the twenty-fou-" when she got cut off by someone slamming the doors open. Sissy stormed into the room. "I have proof that Yumi's NOT Japanese!" she screamed, holding up a paper signed by the Japanese Emperor-Forever. The whole crowd gasped with disgust. The children had chosen their sides. Yumi thought, _I thought I sent my Lunchables Brigade after them. No matter, I'll wipe it up here and now._

"LUNCHABLES BRIGADE, GO!" shouted Yumi, as thousands of shurikens were hurled towards Sissy. Sissy got hit, slammed into the wall, and to her surprise, the wall gave way, making a gaping hole. She was now on the soccer field that they NEVER use, and soon the whole school was seperated in two, on each side of the field. Yumi and Sissy walked up to the center of the field. Yumi started, "How did you survive my attack in Japan?" she asked. "Simple," said Sissy, "I used a decoy! I was long gone before your silly Lunchables Brigade got to me."

"Well, I guess this means war," said Yumi, apparently furious that Sissy revealed her darkest secret. "Yes, I guess it does," said Sissy, a mystical force driving her every word.

Then, everything went horribly wrong.

The sky darkened, and it started to pour down rain. A Xana manifestation popped out of nowhere, taking the shape of a samurai warrior (Except for the giant smiley face in place of where the actual one should be), and planting himself next to Sissy. Suddenly, some noob yelled, "Ulrich Geram Hitur!1!" as Hitler popped out and walked up next to Ulrich, while wearing a pirate hat. He was the true Zombie Nazi Pirate Captain.

Yumi's side of the school consisted of the gang, Hitler, the staff, except the principal and Jim, and half the school. Sissy's side consisted of Sissy and her friends, Xana, Jim, Sephiroth, Cloud, and the other half of the school.

The armies raged towards eachother, battlecries being yelled. Odd just babbled something like, "Rabablablablabla N00BS!" or something of the sort, and they started fighting.

Jeremy was safely 30 feet above the ground in a chair, and was using mind blasts to snipe out students. Odd was screaming at people, safely and cleanly killing them. Ulrich, who had been the first to enter the other army, was blasted away. "Aw...This makes me wanna sulk..." he said, so he sat down behind the sidelines and sulked. Hitler was using a chaingun to gun down his opponents with ease. The Lunchables Brigade was using their amatuer ninja skills to stall the other team's heroes. Yumi started summoning her false Japanese spirits, but realized there were none, so she started smashing people with her forehead. She suddenly realized, "Hey! Wait a second, I have the secrets of the universe in my forehead, somewhere...I HAVE to find it!"

Sissy was using her elite ninja training to her advantage, and was using shurikens like crazy. Herb was using his own creation, Robo-Sissy with hundreds of laser guns strapped to it, from a safe point. Nicholas was using his warhammer to pound the heck outa the others. Xana simply used his sword to battle the schoolchildren. Cloud used his phoenix downs to heal the children the opposing army killed. Sephiroth was wiping out children by the dozens with his 1337ness, until he started battling Hitler.

"I thought I got rid of you years ago," said Sephiroth. "Weel, you tought vrong!" exclaimed Hitler, trying to gun down Sephiroth.

As the battle raged on, the heroes (and villains) were getting more fatigued. Neither side seemed to be better than the other, which is when Sissy saw Yumi searching herself. "You will know," she recalled, "when the time is right." Sissy knew how to summon, her Japanese blood told her. "Yo teeko NEO BAHAMUTO!" yelled Sissy, which actually meant, "I summon NEO BAHAMUT!"

Yumi found it. She had found the secrets, the secret to her forehead, the secrets to the Xana attacks, but most of all: The secrets to the universe. She had learned the way to process this into a beam, and gathered the energy.

Sissy watched as a gaping portal opened on the ground, and a demon-like arm reached out of it. Soon, Neo Bahamut was standing right in front of her, waiting for a command. "Neo Bahamut, ULTRA GIGA FLARE!" she yelled, knowing his ultimate move.

Yumi had gathered the energy, and said, "Eat THIS you demon!"

The world seemed to stand still for a second. The two great energies were about to collide. Everybody realized that it could mean the end of the world, or worse. They stared in horror as the last few milliseconds of the battle went on.

Then, the energies collided, creating a gargantuan explosion. Everybody was wiped out, not sparing a soul. The school was incinerated in a flash of pure energy. Everything went dark.

The next day, everybody was lying on the ground, charred and bloodied by the earlier battle. All was quiet.

Then, the principal slowly walked out, dressed in dark robes, face partially hooded and said, "Rise."

"Yes master," replied Ulrich, as he slowly rose from the crowd of bodies.

"Come my apprentice," said the dark lord. "Yes master," replied Ulrich.

**And there ends my rant-story. I hope you all gained a laugh and some sense from this, I know I did. For those who couldn't understand, it turns out Sissy was the good side, along with Xana and Sephiroth. The gang was actually evil, plotting to take over the world and make millions off of Lyoko and their "animated series".**


	13. Epilogue

**With one last breath, I shall rule the world.**

**Chapter 13: Epilogue**

The next day, everybody was in the cafeteria for dinner. Today was beans and broccoli day, and Odd was chowing down like no tomorrow. In between gulps of his own, he was spoon-feeding his dog/human mixes. Jeremy was checking for Xana attacks, since someone's drink fell on the floor, and he knew it was the work of Xana. Yumi, who was nearly dead, was quietly eating her dinner. Aelita was surveying the damage of the school, and had already repaired the walls with her powers over time and space. Ulrich was wearing dark robes, and hadn't eaten a thing. "c0me on ulrik taek sumting 2 ete or u wil b deed1!" exclaimed Odd, proud that he hadn't made any mispronunciations.

Sissy walked over to the table, and told the gang, "Hey, I know we got in a giant battle and all, but can I-" Jeremy had chosen that moment to raise his hand and blast her across 3 tables. She backed off.

Then a person who was sitting across from the gang leaned back and accidentally hit Yumi. Bad idea. Ulrich raised his head to reveal glowing red eyes, and as soon as he lifted them, the guy who brushed Yumi's back simply exploded.

"Sure half the people were annhialated, and the school has permanent damage, but this seemed like a perfect day!" said Jeremy. "A perfect ending to a typical day," said Jeremy, as everybody started clapping and laughing and simply agreeing. "Which is why I WANT TO RELIVE IT! RETURN TO THE PAST NOW!11!one!shift!" he said. He quickly pulled out a giant button hidden in his pocket and slammed it down on the table. In slow motion, everybody had frantic faces on as Jeremy started his hand down to push the button. Everyone clambered towards Jeremy in an attempt to hold him back, but it was too late. He had pushed the button.

The night was still young. Jeremy was on the edge of his seat while Odd and Yumi were battling the pixel monsters on Lyoko. "Ok you guys, remember, Ulrich's fighting giant robots on the moon, if he dies, he won't come back!" said Jeremy in his fake low toned voice...


End file.
